Just like I start every blog

I start it with an apology for not updating as much.  But seriously. The internet at the apartment blows...

A few updates- I hit the wall about the cats and Eric.  We had a huge fight, and he kicked me out, so Jon and I are moving into our friend Bill's apartment. YAY!!! We'll finally have our own apartment, with our own things! I'm really excited.

I just got off work; Jon has a show in Penn tonight and Jersey tomorrow.  I think I may go out with Bill and my other friend Matt tonight? I'm not sure... regardless, I'm going to go work on vocals, since I have the house to myself hehe. So weird!! Jon and I haven't been apart for even a day since mid June.  It's sick. I know.

This comes from my self employed, self made fantastic poker player friend Rob Felner via Las Vegas

"Hard work is good for building character. But you have that already. Now it's just become redundant. Take it easy, I say"

Uninspired. To the Millionth degree

I've been so uninspired lately.  The drab olive green carpet in the living room isn't helping.  Nor are Eric's 2am impromptu coke binges with 6 other people when I have god damn fucking work at 8am. Fuck him.  They raged until 630, when I went outside to smoke a cigarette. I walked back inside and slammed the door so hard, I thought the china would break.  And by china, I mean the frat boy save-your-empty-liquor-bottles-like-it's-goin-out-of-style china.  I couldn't believe the nerve of him.  He makes us take care of his unpotty trained chronically pukey cats. Never comes home. Doesn't pay rent on time.  Then he shows up to party hard the night his friend comes to town.  Ontop of that, Ryan (jons bandmate) was with him--- note to self: I paid for his lunch cause he had gotten so many Per Diem advances, that the last few days on the road he had no money for food.  Fucker.  And to top off that entire love story, they left the whole fucking mess in the living room for Jon and I the next day. Everything. Coke residue on everything in sight. MORE empty liquor bottles. The list goes on.  Eric's friend who had come into town for the weekend was still asleep on the couch when Jon got home... Jon woke Jonny up and filled him in on the fact that Satan herself was around the corner, and he better start helping to clean the apartment stat.  

When I walked in, Jon met me at the front door with a nervous look in his eyes. "Babe, we're going to smoke weed!"  "Who the fuck is in our living room," was the only thought that rolled out of my head, onto my tongue.  Jon and I hadn't smoked weed in weeks cause we were flat ass broke.  Thats when a cowardice little shadow came around the corner.  Jonny started professing his most sincere apology, when I put my hands up in the space between us, and shook them, and continued with what was on my mind. (there wasn't much on my mind, because I felt like ASS all day!)  

"Shut your fucking mouth because I don't want to hear your voice, asshole.  Don't apologize to me.  You're sorry now? Because the cokes run dry, and you have time to reflect and rationalize on your shitty ass decision? Fuck you."

"I swear to god, I didn't know"

"Shut the fuck up you idiot. Don't EVEN say you didn't know. Because you fucking knew, you piece of shit.  "

He started to stammer some random words...

"- Jon came out there to smoke, and you ASKED 'how' pissed I was.  What... so you turned your music down, apologized, then what did you do?? You kept fucking raging!  You knew exctly what was going on, you piece of shit. Don't you even try to pull that line."

Then I raged for another 10 minutes (mostly about thanking Johnny for cementing the piece of shit, inconsiderate people in Jon's life who call themselves "friends") while he and Jon continued cleaning ground zero.

This all happened 2 weeks ago... I since have been completely uninspired to write music... mostly because life had been so restricted- I literally had 3 dollars to my name. So sucky. Anyways, I'm doing the cleanse right now, and turning over a new leaf.  I had no money, so I had to eat incredibly less healthy than I'd like to admit.  I'm on day 7.  I'm going for 12 days.  But if I hit 12 days, and want to do 2 more, I may.  That's pretty crazy though. 2 weeks!!!! Damn.  I'm sitting up at Athan's- I got my pot of hot water, and added my Smoothe Move teabag at my table.  Unfortunately, the hostess loves me, and she brought me over a chocolatey treat.  That's when I had to break down and tell her why I've been only ordering a plain pot of hot water.  She almost died when I told her that I hadn't eaten in 7 days haha.

But seriously, this has been the easiest time for me to do the cleanse.  I did it once in florida, last october, and again in february in north jersey.  I haven't really had any unbearable moments.  They all pass.

Anyways, I'm going to skip on out of here, but I wanted to give a small update of what has been going on-  work has been taking a lot of life out of me!  I'm working 12 days in a row.  Intense! 

Anyways, Im hoping the Atmosphere show tomorrow puts more inspiration under my ass.  I haven't seen Nate in a hot minute.  It should be a good time, minus the fact that we can't go out for a bomb ass dinner before hand :( !!!

A New Baby In Town

Jesus. I'm not even going to tell you what music I'm listening to right now.  That's right. I'm ashamed of it.

I presume you're all  wondering what the hell the title of my blog means... Well.  For everyone who k

nows JP and Lindsay- the family I used to nanny for- they had their new little guy! His 

name is Balthazar Thomas.  He is absolutely precious! I'm so excited. If I had more than $2.87 in my wallet, I'd be hopping a bus back to Jersey to see him 

and his new-baby-loose-skin right now! But that will have to wait!

As for life- I started training at 

Cafenation last week, only to learn that I would have to train this week as well... so bogus.  I did really well (you have to make crepes- it's pretty nerve-racking) and they said I did so well that they may put me on for the weekend cause it was so busy. YAY MONEY.

::I had to change the music. All the songs other than their first single are wack as shit::

I'm back online at Athans; the internet at the apartment is back to being unbearable.  It put me in a creative/music rut for 2 days, so now I've forced myself out into the town.  I hissed, vampire-like, at the sun.  just kidding. maybe.  While I was in the creative block, I proceeded to put a playlist of the keeper songs I liked.  I took out the few songs that weren't my absolute favorites and replaced them with the straight hip/hop tunes I wrote this week.  I love it.  Jon is at practice now- he'll get home around 11, say he's tired, then I'll show him the work  I did on a song, and he'll get super into it, and work on it some more with me.  He's so great.

We were both so excited to sleep in late together today; or rather, we were both excited for him to finally get to sleep in with me :) .  Unfortunately he got a call at 6:30 from Vic [coworker] 

asking if h could cover 10-2, so he could attend his nephews christening. 

I know. a christening on tuesday morning.  Sure. Liar. I mean... not that it makes much of a difference- I only wake up when Jon leaves, then again to remind him to bring coffee home, then again when he gets there with coffee.  

Am I pitiful?

I've stuck to my work out and eating regimine.  My abs are starting to look great.  So are my saddle bags.  They look hot.  All baggy and shit... but seriously.  You would think I moved on to a strict diet of doughnuts, bread and beer.  I swear to god (I still get a subconscious guilty pang for using that phrase. Damn christian upbringing. Church lasts 2 hours.  Catholic guilt lasts a lifetime. Sometimes carries over into purgatory.), I do abs everyday, and rotate arms/back with legs/ass every other day.  My arms and abs look great.  My upper thighs... sweeeet.  I have no choice but to eat healthy, or virtually nothing at all.  We have absolutely no money til 2 weeks from now.  Jon's next check needs to go to rent.

My amazing headphones are busted.  the right ear doesn't work... I'm going to buy another pair, then return these in the case.  Yes. Hell.  I know.

I also emailed Olympus Customer Service about my bogus replacement camera charger I purchased. I asked for a one free due to my annoyance and money I had already cashed out. When that hopefully happens, I can post many more pictures... like pictures of the living room where I hang out.  And my neighbors house where I hang out.  Maybe the kitchen too.  Yeah...

maybe I should wait on executing the headphone scandal. I should see how the camera story unfolds, before I assume the negative karma from the headphones....

music time!

Athan's Bakery

So, I've decided the only obvious way for me to keep up with the outside world, is to come to the local bakery/coffee shop up the street from me.... ah free wireless and overpriced lattes that I guzzle before I can even get my mac book turned on. I always had a problem with making things last- money, drinks, and boyfriends- all inclusive in that statement.  

So two days ago I painfully rolled out of bed at 12; luckily I had showered the night before.  I threw clothes and makeup on, and was on the 57 into kenmore square by 12:30.  I met up with an old friend of mine on Newbury St for lunch. It was so crazy- I had known him when I was 17, I believe? We met at a show of his eons ago, and kept in touch, then, intentionally fell out of contact.  He had basically turned a blind, possibly bitter back on his partying band days- and consequentially all that came with it.  Regardless, it was great to grab lunch with him- later he sent me the 'fictional' memoir manuscript he was working on.   I read it last night- it was really really amazing, so when it becomes a full book, I'd challenge all of you to read it. It makes me excited to work on my story more. I'm laughing all the way through it, so hopefully you all will too!

So, here I am. Going out of my way to blog! How good am I, karms?? I still don't understand how to add a friends list, or add websites I look at... although the only thing I'd have to contribute there would be perezhilton.com, grouphug.us, and digg.com .  

I finally started training at this coffee shop across the street from me- as in, my location at this exact moment. I went in for two hours yesterday; it seems super easy. I can make a latte like no ones business.  I need money so badly I can taste it- my sugar daddy paid for my phone bill. He's so happy to finally be supporting me, and it makes me happy that he's happy.  It's the first time he's had the hungry-for-paycheck eyes.  I really love him so much. 

The album is coming together more and more every day, although I'm listening to Aesop Rock now, and I think I want to make more songs and nix out some of the old ones. Most of what we wrote has come to be eastern european dance/jazz, but 2 of the songs that we both LOVE are nothing of that style... which leads me to say that after this blog, I'll be opening Garage Band to make some new beats, in effort to make new songs that will help mesh everything together more efficiently.

God, I want another latte. I believe I have $4.00 left. I can't wait for my first paycheck. I need to buy a pair of boots. Fall has officially arrived. I need a jacket too... I have silly tour outfits that are far too skimpy and silly for real life.

Ah, tour is such an alternate reality- it really is.  But if you're on it for long enough, home is kind of your alternative reality... if you have a home... I wonder if I'll ever live in the same place for more than six months. If I had a magic 8 ball, I think the little octagon would pop up with an "Ask Again Later".

I LOVE MY LIFE.

I'm aware it's been a good few months...

And here I am. Shit. Where to even begin... tour was insane. I started writing it all down in my word documents, but shit was just way too hectic to keep track of. One day soon when I have some time I'm going to write down all the mayhem that ensued... The three vans we went through- trailer breaking 3 times in 2 days, or was it 4 in 3? Who knows. It was such a blur... All I know, is that it brought Jon and I miles apart then back together. Things have never been better.

I'm in Boston recording an album with him. Things have almost gotten to a standstill though... just with both of us job hunting and then different work scedules... I did start an awesome song yesterday though. It has a James Brown beat and some sick horns... def needs shaping though. Maybe I'll do it after this post? 

Jon had a show at Newbury Comics today. I woke up at 10 (a huge feat for me- I swear to god I dont LIKE sleeping late- it just happens) and got ready. We got to NC at 1, and I sat in the back and read 'naked, stoned, & looking in my neighbors window'. It derives from www.grouphug.us .... I laughed for 4 hours. And now I'm addicted to the website. Go. Enjoy. Anyways, this post was for Karamea. Cause I felt bad that I'm logged as her best friend...

I swear I'm just bad at blogging and the internet is shut off for a while here. Joy.

Atleast I have fall in New England to look forward to.

I'm aware it's been a good few days

So. I know it's been a hot minute since my last post. I've been insanely busy driving driving driving, doing merch, and getting motion sick from looking at my computer. My first days in Boston were spent at the practice loft  in Boston, in the garage/basement organizing the shit out of everything. It was intense as shit. I have pictures that I need to upload, but I'm way too tired as of right now. Anyways, we left the 30th at like seven at night. Off we went in our veggie oil fueled van. our veggie oil 12 passenger van. how dick sucky is that shit. 9 of us in a 12 passenger. dave almost broke down when he realized that not only was one bench going to be 3 person, but all of us were going to have to rotate the entire tour. not having assigned seats is pretty awful. 

We drove through the night to the 1st, then broke down at 7am. we got a tow truck and got it to a shop after smoking and playing football on the grass/mud. The mechanic told us the veg oil was broken and to run off diesel for a while. Then the van continuously shook when we went over 60. Then the seatbelts stopped unclicking. Then the air started smelling like diesel. It was pretty amazing. and by amazing I mean fucking awful. [not to mention it was still a 12 passenger]. So we finally get to Detroit. We literally pull in and unload like a fucking... I don't know.... something incredibly quick. Regardless. I have this chick there to count me in- she literally wants to count EVERYTHING I own. all 95 designs. After I set everything up, I look across the room, and who is it but Drew! Bad Religion Drew. My protector and big brother on warped. god I love him. so much. 

anyways, that made the entire tour that much better. So we sell and then count out. Drive to chicago. Roy came. The day was pretty uneventful other than the sucky 5 flight load in. Michael J came out though. it was cool. After that we went to Minneapolis. We were fashionably late again. hahahah. Nate didn't end up coming out, I was bummed as shit. He had some show to play and he wasn't in town. so shitty. I was looking so forward to it. We got a hotel that night and drove to milwaukee the next day. I need to start taking more pictures! I can't remember what the venue looked like. shiza! it's literally been... sit in the van cramped, and drive for HOURS. the drives are super gnarly cause it's routed to be a bus tour. not a veggie oil broke as fuck van tour. at least we've smoked a lot... but now I need to buckle down and start life. I need to go through and make an EXACT spreadsheet. I've been putting the totals and pay outs and all that stuff in the bottom right hand corner, but I need to make an exact format for everything. it's been bugging me. and I need to do the lyrics to that song. my life has been engulfed in merch. 

Shit should be way better since we're renting a 15 passnger tomorrow. Apparently the mechanic we went to today said the vans engine should be blowing up sometime in the next hundred miles. then we found out that the trailers bearings are totally fucked up. so we're not going to make the overnight drive to cleveland  tonight. were staying and getting a 15 passenger, fixing the trailer, then hauling ass to canada. I need to send my reports into the broker. I'm going to go work on that now.

This was long! Thankfully, we've been watching Jackass the movie. SO FUNNY.